It Wasn't Me!

The Whyte & Mackay website says, "Today, when the traditional masculine values of pride, integrity and style are often forfeited in favour of profit, expediency and celebrity, Whyte & Mackay Blended Scotch Whisky remains the No.1 choice of Scots, who appreciate its rich, smooth flavour, achieved by maintaining the time-honoured Double Marriage Blending process, something that all Scotch whisky distillers did before accountants took over the world."

I took their word seriously and tried to act the fool last weekend after 5 pegs. The whiskey was in a way to celebrate my new car which I had been waiting to get delivered for almost 3 months. The drinking started and Tata Sky began airing Home Shopping programmes on almost all the channels. Madness stuck I began calling each and every one of them, ordering Vegetable slicers, Hanuman Suraksha Kawaj, drills, frying pans, astrological rings...everything. I used various names from Kishore Gharwar to Sarafarosh Dave (I don't recall half of the names). One guy even convinced me that I would get married in a few days even though I'm dark, bald and a dwarf if I got one of their luck changing pendant.

All done; good laugh; good drink; I forgot...till I started getting calls from all and sundry from yesterday, with people selling me pans, screws, their daughters, maids...the stuff! They had got back by passing on my phone number to the entire telemarketing universe. How can I say that it wasn't me but Whyte & Mackay and Tata Sky who were to be blamed.

Oh! Wait, got another call. They are selling adult diapers...damn I'm screwed!

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Posted in: drink,insanity,personal